Hello! Welcome to Sunday!
Last weekend was so busy with family (and so was the one before)! I missed my blog post last week; I apologize for not explaining. I was completely overwhelmed by the festivities!
I also have almost an entire spiral of notes from the Story Summit Conference I attended. I believe there were 41 interviews, each half an hour to an hour long. There is a lot of material, and it has taken me a great deal of time to sum it up in this post.
I’m going to give you most of it in bullet points. Please feel free to take what applies to you.
So, let’s jump in!
Tips to Tell Our Stories
- Speak from direct experience so your story is all yours
- Tell your story to serve your audience
- Don’t model your story after someone else’s. Your story is unprecedented.
- Breathe deeply for about a minute before you share your story live. Get “centered” first.
- Use intrigue and tension so your audience needs to know what’s on the other side of the story. Keep them on the edge of their seat.
- Speak to the emotions (the child loving the story), then use logic (the adult that makes decisions)
- Don’t speak in jargon. Speak/Write as if talking to a 4th grader.
- Speak conversationally – don’t be too formal.
- Use the “Dear Diary” method when you write your emails.
- Write to someone like you would want them to write to you.
- Paint a picture using all five senses.
- Don’t give the meaning of the story before you tell the story.
- Bring the hearer into the story with sensory details.
Telling A Positive Story
The story can liberate your audience or reinforce stuckness.
- Start with today. Who are you today? Share from a place of resilience and strength.
- Lead with curiosity.
- Share what excites you. What are you excited to share with people? I’ve always had a dream that… Then, share challenges.
- Take charge of your story and direct it as a movie director.
- Share from the scar and not the wound.
- Be vulnerable to connect rather than cause a reaction.
- To be in the service of your audience, don’t become emotional.
- Consider what you would say if you tell your story and feel your emotions unapologetically. See your own innocence in your story. Don’t speak from shame.
- Believe in something bigger than you. Share an idealistic vision, so people know you can’t do it alone. People will come and support you.
- We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control the story we tell about it. Own how you tell your story.
- Tell a superpower story: What are some of your biggest challenges? Who showed you kindness and support? What wisdom and strengths did you gain?
- Think about the emotion you want to evoke in the hearer.
What Makes Your Story Unique
- There is only one of you.
- Genuineness = blood and bones informing your story
- Your story will evolve over time.
The Science Behind Storytelling
- oxytocin- sense of belonging, kinship
- dopamine- instant gratification, reward center
- adrenaline
- cortisol- stress. Causes separation and defensiveness.
Speak to aspiration and share yourself to unlock dopamine and oxytocin. Give people specific details about your life and journey. Specifics make the story universal/relatable.
Don’t lead with the problem. This causes cortisol to spike. It’s inadequacy marketing. If I start with the problem, it will put my audience on the defensive.
The more parts of the brain that light up during the telling of a story, the greater the memory created.
Feeling Fear
This is one of my favorite sentences from my notes: There’s nothing wrong with you; it’s just fear. LOL! I love this because it puts fear in its place by calling it “just fear.” And also, it hits the nail on the head! There is nothing wrong with feeling fear in telling our stories. It’s a vulnerable thing to do. Of course, there’s going to be a bit of fear! Let your vision be bigger than your fear. Know that the sick feeling you sometimes get is excitement.
P.S.
Practice, practice, practice. If writing, edit, edit, edit!
Conclusion
These are my notes on telling a story. In conclusion, a story must have five parts. There is a goal. Something must be at stake. It is the bad thing that happens if the goal doesn’t succeed. There’s a clearly defined opposing force trying to stop you. You have a plan and a way for your audience to participate in overcoming the opposing force to achieve the goal. The audience must get an immediate benefit that leads to a global benefit.
So, in conclusion again, I feel this is not a very good conclusion… This post is a summation of my notes. I feel it is important to share in its imperfection because it can be helpful.
Please forgive the unusual outline!
What did you find useful? Did any bullet points in particular stand out? Were you surprised by the science behind storytelling?
Have a great rest of your weekend!
Hi Nakina,
Great post with a lot of great information that’s for sure!
With all the AI running out there, I’m quite positive that being genuine and offering a helping hand instead of a scold will definitely bring in a lot more subscribers!
I totally love your phrase: “there’s nothing wrong with you, it’s only fear!”. Now that made me laugh out loud! Good thing I wasn’t drinking something, I would have spilled it everywhere!
All the best!
Hi, Marc! I’m glad you got a chuckle! I do like that phrase! I do prefer a blog that is not patronizing or scolding. I hope never to be that way, but simply be helpful and share what I am learning. All the best to you!
Nakina